Sonoran Sue- Fry’s Shoppers “Bearly” Survive!
October 18th, 2025
Dear Sonoran Sue,
I had the fright of my life while shopping at the Fry’s on Oracle. A bear had wandered into the store! I was in fresh produce when I heard someone shout, “Bear in aisle seven!!
I immediately armed myself with two unripe cantaloupes and assumed a defensive stance behind the organic lettuce display. My plan was to aim for the snout—though honestly, at my age, he’s more likely think we’re playing catch.
The bear headed toward the bakery, which makes sense—those free samples are legendary. People were screaming, managers were calling 911, but most were filming it on their cell phones.
Please tell me, Sue, how should a senior react in a bear emergency at Fry’s?
Mildred, a loyal, but terrified Fry’s shopper
Dear Mildred,
That is terrifying! Only in the Wild West of Arizona can grocery shopping double as a melon- wielding wild life showdown. Bears at Fry’s aren’t as far-fetched as you’d think.
Between the bakery samples, rotisserie chickens, and that irresistible scent of mango salsa, it’s basically an all-you-can-eat buffet for the wildlife. The bear wasn’t attacking—it was bargain hunting.
If this ever happens again, here’s what Sue recommends:
1. Don’t panic.
Screaming only startles the bear and interrupts everyone else’s digital couponing.
2. Slowly back away from the produce section.
This is good life advice in general—especially when cantaloupes are $6.99 a pound.
3. Avoid Eye Contact. Especially if you’re wearing animal print. Nothing says “challenge accepted” like a leopard blouse at 50% off.
4. Don’t Run. This triggers a bear’s instinct to chase, and unless you’ve been training for the Senior Olympics, that’s a losing proposition. Move slowly toward the nearest exit—or better yet, the wine aisle, where most encounters end peacefully.
5. Leave the store and notify management.
Let trained professionals handle the situation. (And by “trained professionals,” I mean the deli clerk armed with a pair of tongs and a five pound slab of pastrami.)
6. Don’t try to film it for Facebook.
The ‘OMG Bear at Fry’s,’ posts will only encourage more of them to wander in , wearing sun glasses, and hoping to go viral.
7. Afterward, treat yourself to a bakery bear claw. You’ve earned it, and poetic justice is the best excuse to indulge.
And please, for the love of Pooh—do not offer it honey. That’s how fairy tales start, only with a less than happy ending. The SB Patrol was recently called to a situation where someone tried to befriend a javelina with Fig Newtons. She hasn’t seen her welcome mat, or her Subaru front bumper since.
Remember: —“Only you can prevent aisle seven panic.”
Hope all this helps,
Sonoran Sue
Out there looking for frosted, not furry bear claws.
Susan Kravitz is the creator of the Comedy Klatch performing troop in SaddleBrooke. Her crew will be performing several skits in Fall of 2025.
